I choked up before I could even speak a word. The ultrasound confirmed my worst fear, the
cancer that had been confined to a small area of the abdomen, had now taken
over the whole abdomen. She was going to
die. I knew I needed to tell mom, but
the words wouldn't come, I just looked at mom with tears running down my cheeks
and she knew. She started crying as I
finally found my voice and started telling her the cancer had spread and her
beautiful daughter was not going to be around much longer.
She understood, maybe better than any other patient
has understood, that one they love is dying.
She immediately reached out and held her daughter and cried. I put my arm around her, and on Vero's head
and cried with them. Cried for the years
she will never have, for the medicine that quit working, for this mom who trusted
me with the life of her daughter, bringing her each week for treatment, for
this child who has met me with a smile each week, despite the pain she feels. Mom didn't say much, she couldn't and neither
could I. I was looking at Vero and
caught her looking
I imagine that we weren't the only ones
crying, I think God was also crying. Not
just for Vero, but for all the hurting kids and adults around the world who are
suffering. I am thankful that Vero will
get a new body without cancer and will have a heavenly father who loves and
will look after her.
I have no answers for mom, I have no
answers for my own questions as to why Vero, why didn't the medicines work, why
couldn't Vero be in another country with different chemo options, why couldn't
she grow up and go to school or be married and have kids? But I know God is good and loving and is
sufficient in all our trials. I pray
Vero's mom can help show that love to Vero in these last few days, and God will
give me the strength to keep fighting for the lives of these little ones.
